Off to the Races

Even though I hate animals, I jumped at the chance last weekend to spend the day outside with a bunch of prepsters watching the horse races. Preakness is one of the triple crown races and the winner of the Kentucky Derby also competes here. Let's be honest I could care less about all the horse stuff. I was more interested in what people wore especially their great hats.





We unfortunately did not dawn the great hats but I seriously wish there were more places to wear one so I could have invested in one. Maybe I should get one anyway. I mean I am sure I could find a place to wear a giant hat with a big bow on it. After a long winter is was so fun to be outside all day with great friends even if the reason was to watch animals run around in a circle.

Leavin' Liberia

It's good to be home. O so good. I love showering without gecko eyes staring me down and falling asleep with out the potential of bugs crawling in my ear. I did bring back some treasures from Liberia in the form of Montezuma's Revenge African style. But all in all it was a good trip--the work was interesting and I learned a lot. Here is a look at my life the last two weeks.

The view at dinner every night

Remnants of the war

Ugg I wish the pic would have turned out better. The humidity was so thick it was making my camera act crazy. These little girls were adorable. I met them on my way back to the hotel one night. They have huge bins on the their heads full of clothes I can only assume they were washing their clothes in the ocean as they were coming from that direction. And in their buckets is water that might be for cooking. I asked if I could take their picture and the little one in front jumped in front of the others and was posing away for me. They were so excited to practice their English with me. They have amazing balance to carry those buckets on their heads.

In case you didn't know how one gets malaria. PS. this pic is disturbing on so many levels but mostly because of the giant mosquitos flying around the bed. This was posted on the wall of my cube at work.

Don't let the wet face fool you I did not just come from the ocean. I'm a sweater and I came home drenched in sweat every night. So attractive I know.

This may look like I spent my time doing some illegal extracurricular activities however, in reality its The money that I exchanged but that NO one will buy back. Not even the hotel or restaurant in Liberia would accept Liberia dollars. That would have been nice to know before I exchanged it.

Albie.

And because I'm such a nice person, I thought I'd leave you with a few words of wisdom. Don't ever say I never gave you anything. You're welcome.

C's Guide to Killing Cockroaches*

1. Determine the size
a. If it's half the size of your pinky finger proceed to step #2. If it's larger, proceed to step #7
2. Take a deep breath--you CAN do this
3. Find a shoe with a hard bottom. Flip flops or tennis shoes are not hard enough to crush the exoskeleton. Dress shoes work great.
4. Use your cat like reflexes and superwoman strength to crush the cockroach.
5. Make sure it's dead--this may take several blows.
6. Wrap carcass in TP and dispose of in the toilet. Flush twice--if you leave it on the ground, it will attract hundreds of ants (trust me).
7. Find the nearest bowl, mug, or cigarette dish making sure it has a flat opening
8. Position yourself behind the cockroach (in case it scurries away you won't be in its line of movement).
9. Use your cat like reflexes and superwoman strength to place the dish on top of the cockroach ensuring that its entire body is covered.
10. Make sure the dish is secure by placing a book or something heavy on top.
11. Leave for the maid* to clean up

*Do I feel guilty for leaving "treasures" for the maid to clean up? Only as guilty as the hotel feels for charging me $150 a night for the cockroach motel.

New Friends

Dear Mom,

I am making lots of new friends in Liberia that I want to tell you about them. Every time you work in an Embassy, you have to do a security briefing to get to know the rules for that country. Mine was was done by a really hot Marine, named Kip. (Seriously—Kip??). He had the body of the Rock (our favorite!!) and the face of Brad Pitt. He was wearing khaki cargo pants and a fitted Columbia button up safari shirt. He had on khaki desert storm boots and was wearing a badge and gun. He would totally fulfill one of my husband requirements: if we were in a dark alley and someone tried to jump us, my husband has to be capable of protecting me. Anyway, GI Kippy (is kip short for anything? Kiptyn? Go by your middle name, buddy) was really intense and basically instilled terror into my soul. I learned that the Liberian embassy is the most evacuated mission in the world—so comforting. What's the best advice I got from GI Kippy considering the the country that I am in, you ask? “Don’t eat meat off the street”. Thanks buddy, but I wasn’t planning on it. While every place is a little different there are certain travel “rules” that apply to most places. Eating street meat is one of them.


My next friend is one you only meet once in a life time...or so you hope. The two "nicer" hotels that are also closer to the Embassy did not have any vacancies when I arrived. So the only choice I had was the Atlantic Beach Guest House. Don't let the name fool you, it is probably the sketchiest hotel I’ve stayed in a capital city on a work trip. I first met my new friend in the shower of my new home. He greeted me in all his albino gecko glory and so I lovingly call him Albie. It's better to be on familiar terms if we are going to be cohabitants. I was going to try and capture him under a bowl because I didn’t want to kill him and that way I would know where he was but alas he was way too fast. There was one low point where he scurried past me and as I was trying to get away I accidentally closed the bathroom door trapping me inside with him. I was so flustered it took me a few minutes to open the door and after that I refused to go back into the bathroom. When I had to go the bathroom later, I seriously considered Baby Mama styling it in the kitchen sink. But decided I couldn’t relieve myself in the kitchen sink for two weeks so I bucked up and made a run for it. I didn’t see Albie but I have never peeped so fast in my life. That night I was convinced Albie would find a way into my bed and I would wake up with him scurrying across my face.

I really like my new friends and considering that we are on lock down (work/hotel and nothing else) since bin Laden's was killed I know I'll be spending lots of time with both of them. Hope everything at home is well.

Your Loving Daughter,

Chelsea